Carl's Corner... Part IV

As we left our story, Elizabeth had just blown a ball off of the pool table much to the surprise of everyone in the joint...especially ME!

Back To The Story.........

I couldn't believe it but Elizabeth was just sitting there smiling while everyone else in the place was ducking and/or running for cover. When the screams, shouts and the echoes of the gunshot subsided, Elizabeth stood slowly.

"Now, get the hell out of here and don't come back." she pointed the pistol at the mean looking dude.

To his credit, he didn't look the slightest bit frightened.

"You ain't gonna shoot anybody bitch!" he shouted.

Damned if she didn't laugh and squeeze off ANOTHER friggin' round which hit the cue rack, shattering one or more of the cue sticks hanging there!

What the hell was I doing here?

One of the other guys pleaded with the mean looking dude.

"Man, we don't need this shit! Let's get the hell out of here Bobby!" he said as he headed for the door followed closely by two others.

'Mean Lookin' Dude' stared at her and sneered.

"I'm leavin' bitch." he said, then looked at me while he added."Just so your pussy boy guitar player can... perform."

Well just fuck me to tears! What the hell did I do? and.....what was I supposed to say to THAT?

Side Note: Sometimes, it really sucks out loud to be a man who considers himself to be, at the very least, semi-macho. Damn it, you can't just stand there and be "dissed" in public without doing something! It's just not done....damn it.

On With The Show.....

I don't know what I should have said but, what I did say was.....

"Why don't you take your greasy ass out of here before this crazy broad decides to shoot somethin' besides pool balls?"

Clever huh? I'm quick that way.

"I'm goin' but I'll see you later." he said as he looked at me.

Well damn....I wasn't the one who had just shot his ball off the table!

He walked to the front door, opened it and turned around as if to say something.

"One more fuckin' word and the next one's at your head." Elizabeth snarled.

It was quite obvious that she had done this shit before! There was dead calm in her voice. It really was spooky.

That woman out 'macho-ed' most men I've ever known.

Months later, I asked myself why I didn't get the hell away from her that very night but the truth is simple.......I ain't real bright! Have ya'll ever read my drivel? It's a friggin' re-occuring theme in my life. Stupid just happens in my life.

'Mean Lookin' Dude' glared at her and then....of course, ME but, he didn't violate Elizabeth's revocation of his right to free speech..he left without a word.

Before the front door closed behind him, I was packin' up to get away from that insane woman.

I reached to pick up my guitar and stopped in mid grab.

Somehow, during Elizabeth's fucking Wild West Show, some sorry son of a whore had snapped my guitar in two!!

I stared at it lying there. It was such a great old guitar and it was lyin' there.... mortally wounded.

That old Washburn was my baby. It was also my livelihood. I was completely and honestly stunned.

I picked it up. The neck was still connected to the body but only because of the strings. The body looked as though someone had put their foot through it. It was dead with no hope of repair.

Elizabeth was staring at me as I turned to look at her. She had a shocked look on her face.

"Oh my God!" she shouted. "What happened to your guitar?"

I thought my head was going to explode!

What happened?

My first reaction was to go nuts on her but, thankfully, I really was stunned. I didn't know what the hell to say or do. That doesn't happened to me very often. Right or wrong, I normally have something to say.

Several things were in play at that moment.

Let's review....

I was unemployed, had almost no money, my livelihood had just been smashed, my other guitar was a piece of shit, the woman who had given me a glimmer of hope was a freakin' whacko and, oh by the way.......the dizzy bitch was STILL holding that fucking pistol in her damned hand!

I needed to be VERY careful here.

"Somebody killed it." I said quietly.

She put her gun back in her purse and walked over to me.

"Who did it?" she asked.

"I don't know Elizabeth, I was too busy duckin' bullets to pay much attention to anything else." I was pissed.

She looked at me, gave me that evil grin and.....I'm not makin' this up.....she said.

"Wasn't that COOL?"

I sat down on the nearest bar stool and just shook my head.

"No Liz, I do NOT think that was cool...that was the stupidest thing I've ever seen in my life and I've been around a whole shitload of STUPID in my time!

She acted as though I was crazy.

"Well hell, you just don't know fun when you see it." she cracked.

"Damn it Elizabeth....my guitar is friggin' kindling! I don't call that COOL!" I snapped at her.

"Oh to hell with that old guitar! We'll go get you a new one, a BETTER one first thing tomorrow!" she screamed. "Stop your damned whining!"

"Really?" I was shocked.

"Sure, you've got my word on it." she said sincerely.

"You ain't gonna like the price tag." I said with a laugh.

"How much is a good guitar going for these days?" she asked.

"A good guitar goes for about $700.00 bucks." I said.

"Well hell, that's not too bad." she said.

"Your problem is that MY guitar wasn't a good on.....my guitar was a great guitar." I grinned.

The smile disappeared from her face.

"Just how fucking great was it?"

"Close to two grand....if not a little more." I said.

"Good God." she gasped.

"I hate it for you darlin' but that's the truth." I laughed.

She took a deep breath then suddenly, her face beamed.

"Shit....my insurance will cover it." she said. "Who knows? Maybe I'll pad the claim a bit and come out ahead in this deal."

This woman was a shady little thing!

"Well, that's your business." I chuckled. "I don't wanna hear about the details."

Unbelievably, the place hadn't emptied out. Most of the folks were still hanging out. Patsy had cranked up the juke box and people were still partying.

Just then, Sara and Libby came scampering over.

"Holy shit! Do you believe that?" Libby squealed.

"Are you ok?" Sara started then she saw what used to be my guitar. "Oh shit!!"

Elizabeth looked at me.

"Let's have a drink." she said.

I asked the girls to excuse me for a moment and moved close to Elizabeth.

"Elizabeth.....I'll have another drink or two with and then I'm going back home." I told her.

She laughed.

"God you're such a wuss."

"Yeah well, you're a friggin' maniac."

"Ain't I though?" she giggle. "Now sit your ass down and let me tell you what I want to do."

We had another couple of Kamikazi's while she laid out her plan.

"I want you to take over this place. It'll be yours to run as you please.... as long as I make money." she began. "What would it take to turn this place into a money maker?" she asked.

I thought about it for a moment. Hell, it couldn't hurt to hear her out and, at least, think it over.

Right?

"For starters, I think I'm safe in saying that you shouldn't shoot at the customers. Call me crazy but I think that's just lousy for business." I said sarcastically.

She laughed

"Go on...I'm all ears." she smiled.

"Second....you need to shut this sumbitch down for a month or so and remodel." I suggested. "No self respecting whino would be caught dead in here."

"You got that right." she agreed.

"I'd also suggest that you stay the hell out of here but, I'm thinkin' that ain't gonna happen......right?"

She grinned.

"Damn.....cute AND smart!" she said. "I ain't gettin' barred from my own damned place!"

I laughed.

"I'll just say this then." I looked her in the eyes. "We'll talk tomorrow. If we agree to do this, I want our agreement in writing and notarized before we do anything. I ain't gettin' fired everytime your crazy ass get's a fucking hot flash!"

She laughed her ass off.

She was enjoying this.

"Done." she slapped her hand on the bar. "Patsy...two more of them Chinese sumbitches!

"It's Japanese." I said.

She shot me a curious look.

"Who's Japanese?" she asked.

"The drinks....'Kamikazi' is a Japanese word...you said Chinese." I said innocently.

"You are one picky sumbitch!" she snapped.

The drinks came and we drank them.

"Well, I'm gettin' the hell out of here. I'll talk to you tomorrow if you don't change your mind." I said.

"I'm not gonna change my mind." she said quickly. "How are you getting home? You ain't driving my car." she said.

"Hell, it ain't far and I could use the air....I'll walk." I said.

"Hang on....I'll call you a cab." she said.

Just then, Sara came back.

"If you need a ride, why don't I take you home?" she asked, smiling sweetly.

"Well thank you darlin'." I said, grinning at Elizabeth.

"Maybe you could play for me a little bit." Sara said.

I pointed at my broken guitar.

"My guitar is smashed all to hell." I stated the obvious.

She gave me a sexy look and, I swear, she said....

"I'll make you forget all about that old guitar."

What's a guy to say about THAT?

I accepted her kind offer.

To Be Continued.........