I Wish I Were A Black Person

Seriously, if I were Black I could say what I'm about to say without being called a Racist, which I am not. I'm sure if anyone actually reads this, I'll be called one but I'm not. I know, I know,...."The racist doth protest too much".

I was watching the coverage of President Bush speaking to the NAACP the other day and to be honest, I was almost literally sick to my stomach. It's hard to believe that such a morally good man (in my opinion) would prostrate himself before that ridiculous organization. Talk about casting the proverbial pearls before swine!

The NAACP is a pox upon every Black person in America and should be outlawed by Blacks themselves. The very name alone is an abomination...National Association of Colored People my saggin' ass! A couple of points here to begin with:

1) If ANY white person referred to a person of color as "Colored" they would be prosecuted or, at the very least, persecuted as a racist.

2) When is the last time a person of color OTHER than a Black person was championed by the NAACP? Oh yeah...they really stood behind the nomination of Gonzales right? Please.....correct me if I'm wrong.

3) Why is it that the NAACP doesn't champion the rights of Mexican's? Could it be that they are pissed because Blacks are quickly being replaced as the largest minority group in America by...oh yeah, MEXICANS? Actually, I think they already have been.

Just asking....

Why did George Bush waste his breath on the NAACP? Does he really believe that conceding to them would garner even a small degree of support? A modicum of respect? If so, the man needs to be impeached for being freakin' delusional!

It is a FACT that no other racial group in America votes in lock step to the extent that Blacks do. What is it? 96% Democrat? Talk about your "SHEEP"! If I were a Black person, I would be ashamed. Allan Keyes, Bill Cosby, Rev. Peterson et al have said it far better than I but it simply amazes me that an entire race can be sold so willingly into political prostitution. They have been a race of political whores for well over half a generation now and for what? Governmental slavery?

The Democrats were in power for over forty years and all they did was supervise over the ruination of an entire race of Americans. They brought about Lyndon Johnsons' "Great Society" alright.... a great society of whiners, criminals, welfare trough feeders, fatherless children and career victims. Thank God that some blacks have not bought into this ridiculous mentality. Perhaps there IS hope.

George Bush might as have well have been pissing up a rope according to such Black luminaries as Al Sharpton, Julian Bond and Jesse Jackson. After the speech all they did was bitch about what he didn't say.

The President could have declared that every Black person in America would be paid $250,000 in slavery reparations, a free college education, guaranteed high paying government jobs for life, free health care and immunity from prosecution from ANY crime known to man and Jesse Jackson would still be out there busting a ridiculous ryhme about how the President refused to guarantee Black folks freedom from Sickle Cell Anemia and Aids!

I can hear him now...."How we gon be freed if we is diseased?"

Speaking of "Reparations"...

I am going on record as stating that I will personally pay $10,000,000 American dollars to any living Black person who was ever owned by a white man in the United States.

Again....I degress.

I disagree with the President on many things. I was against the Iraq war but we are there now so....we have to win it. His stance (or lack thereof) on immigration is horrendous. He's trying to out Democrat the freakin' Democrat's on wasteful spending and last but not least...he caved in and spoke to the freakin' NAACP after they have spent the past five years calling him everything except George Bush!

I would have rather have seen him have queer sex with Richard Simmons in Times Square than to have seen him give such an ass kissing speech to the NAACP! Ok....maybe not the queer sex thing but you catch my drift.

If he felt compelled to give a speech to that pathetic body it should have gone something like this.

"I came here today to let you know that Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Fredrick Douglas, Abraham Lincoln, and Booker T. Washington are spinning in their collective graves at the way the NAACP has sold out Blacks in America. You have slandered me, you have campaigned against me and your so-called leaders have lied to you in order to line their own pockets. If they weren't able to fabricate imagined wrongs, Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, Cynthia McCrazy and a plethera of others corrupt morons would be out of business. They ought to be ashamed of themselves and so should those of you morons who support them. They have sold their souls to the devil and, as far as I'm concerned, ya'll can all kiss my Texas ass!"

"I'm sending the Secret Service out for a fews beers when I'm finished here and I'll be waiting backstage ALONE. If you've got half the balls as you do mouth Julian Bond, meet me backstage 'cause I'd LOVE to stomp a good ole Texas mudhole in your half breed ass!"

"Oh yeah....as of today, I'm am revoking the NAACP's tax free status for promoting a single political agenda. Thank you and God Bless ALL Americans."

Ahh....perchance to dream.

In closing, let me state for the record...

I would vote for Condi Rice if she ran for President. I think Denzell Washington is probably the best actor this side of that Liberal piece of shit Morgan Freedman. Michael Jordan is the greatest athelete I've ever seen. Tiger Woods is "The MAN". Hallie Berry is quite possibly the most beautiful woman in the world. Ray Charles was the greatest musician I've ever heard. Ali is and was the "GREATEST". Jackie Robinson belongs on Mt. Rushmore and Thomas Sowell is the smartest man in America. PERIOD.

Racist? Nope....I'm a REALIST.

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Sheep

I have never understood the "flock mentality" of so many people.
Why the hell would ANYONE want to wear, drive, possess or desire the exact same things that EVERBODY else possesses?
I remember how Bass Weeguns (sp?), Gant and Enroe (sp?) shirts and Khaki pants were all the rage when I was in high school. Even then, I thought kids who fixated on them were sheep and told them so. Now granted, I was a freakin' HUNK and didn't need all the "popular" crap to attract girls but still... I rejected that horseshit. The only IN thing I desired were Converse All-Stars basketball shoes because, popular or not, they were the best shoes out there at the time. I finally got a pair when I could buy them for myself years later.
Maybe it was because my parents couldn't afford all that "popular" stuff anyway but I developed an early dislike for "popular" things.
I love tormenting friends and loved ones who covet such things by issueing a hearty "BAAAAHH" everytime I hear them gush about what's "in style". I go out of my way to avoid ANYTHING that "everyone" else is interested in.
If someone steals my stuff, I can identify it!! It's different from other peoples.
The surest way to keep me from buying something is for a salesman to proclaim that, "this is a very popular item these days". Hell, I don't want something that carries that claim to fame. I want something that I'LL still like when every other sheep has moved on to something else.
Screw "POPULAR"....show me quality and individuality anytime.

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Leaders?

It's a damned shame that Americans have become so blind that they cannot or will not see some "leaders" for what they are....self serving, self perpetuating manipulative, EVIL bastards...or bitches.
Let me name a few...
Jesse Jackson
This guy is a true piece of shit. He should have died on that balcony. NOT Dr. King.
Al Sharpton
Can you say Tawana Brawley? If he's a "Reverend" I'm a freakin' Japanese test pilot.
Hillary Clinton
Read one of my previous posts..she's evil.
Ted Kennedy
I wouldn't vote for anyone who can't even get his date home without drowning her. He's a political whore and I believe he will burn in hell.
John Kerry
I can't even stand to look at that piece of sub human debris. If he's a war hero, I'm John freakin' Wayne. The Swift Boat guys should be given a national medal of freedom for helping to save us from that prick. At least they did SOMETHING to earn a medal.
John McCain
I don't care WHAT he did as a P.O.W. and I'm not sure he was such a hero as HE claimed but I do know he's a waffling, spineless, self serving moron now. He couldn't lead a turd down a toilet!
Howard Dean
The leader of the DNC? Doesn't that tell you all you need to know about Liberals? What an insane pinhead. The greatest service he ever provided for America was forgetting his medication that night when he went on his memorable meltdown.

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Life In A Tourist Town

Living in a tourist area does have it's draw backs. One of the worst being SLOW drivers. I once had some bumper stickers made up with a picture of Elmer Fudd and the message read, "It's tourist season in the High Country....Got AMMO?" All the locals wanted them!

Now, I realize that the average age of our tourists in the summer is DEAD and that the old farts are on vacation but DAMN they ought to have the decency to pull off the side of the road when they are doing 25 mph in 55 mph zone with twenty cars behind them who actually need to get somewhere!! I've put up with it for 20 yrs and it really gets old.

Having said that:

I was driving to my office this morning, minding my own business and enjoying the gorgeous morning when all of a sudden, a car pulled onto the road in front of me. Never mind that I was doing the speed limit, 55 mph, and I was only 50 yards away from the moron who pulled out in my way...hell, that's why God made brakes. What REALLY chapped my ass was that aforementioned moron decided to drive at about 30 mph, oblivious to the traffic building up behind him. For the next seven miles, approximately fifteen vehicles followed this asshat while he blissfully performed a freakin' running road block! As we came into the Linville area where the road turns into two lanes and the speed limit goes down to 25 mph, this jerk speeds up to 45 mph at which time I punch my Suburban and pass him on the right, get ahead of him and switch back into the left lane AHEAD of him. Hah! Since it was a cool morning I had the window down so I clearly heard the idiot man lay down on his horn, scream something and, of course, in my rear view mirror, I see him give me the obligatory moron salute with his middle finger!At this point, I did something I can't believe I actually DID.

I rolled to a stop at the intersection, put my car in park, got out and walked back to the moron's car. Fortunately, it was a much older man than myself so I reined in my temper but I still walked up to his window and said....and I quote:

"Mister, with all due respect for your age and obviously limited IQ, I'm not going to drag your sorry ass out of your car and humiliate you in front of all these people. I wouldn't have passed you if you weren't doing twenty five mph BELOW the speed limit and holding up traffic! You oughta thank your lucky stars you're not twenty years younger or I'd break that finger off and shove it up your ass!"

HE says, "Well you broke the law!"

I said, "You did too by driving twenty five mph UNDER the speed limit and if you ever flip me off again, I'm gonna go to Hickory, get my old man and have him stomp a mudhole in your ass!! Now, unlike you, I've gotta get to work! Remember what I told you."

As I walked back to my car, I looked back and saw the people in the car behind the aged idiot. They were laughing their asses off, applauding and giving me the thumbs up. I took a dramatic bow, got back in and drove off.

Actually, I thought I'd feel better about it than I did but...I didn't. I'm really sort of ashamed of myself but damn it...people don't get called on their bullshit in this day and age. That's why they keep showing their asses and being rude.

I'm still not real proud of it but, it was funny as hell to see that cantankerous old Yankee bastard's face!

You may be asking how I knew he was a Yankee. Well, because they all are! We call the summer oldsters "Floridiots" because they are cheap, rude, winter in Florida, summer here and they all sound like someone off the Soprano's!

But still...I won't be doing that again...maybe. It wasn't as satifying as the time I was behind a dickhead in the express/cash only lane who had WAY more than the maximum number of items AND was gettin ready to write a freakin' check!
The young clerk looked at all of us waiting in as if to say, "what can I do?"
I asked the dickhead if he needed me to fill out the check for him. He of course, looked at me like I was crazy so I pointed to the sign and said, "Well, I just figured you can't read or you're freakin' blind!"
Everyone in line howled! Dickhead never said a word, set a land speed record for check writing and left in a huge hurry!

The clerk said, "I've been wondering how to handle that situation. Thanks."

Yep....I'm a cantankerous jerk sometimes.

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We went down the mountain to Lake James Friday and my lord was it hot! I can't believe I ever lived in Columbia, SC for most of my life. It was a lot hotter and certainly more humid in Columbia than it is in Marion, NC but somehow, I handled it. I can't take it so well these days. We actually came home late Saturday afternoon because there was a mean thunderstorm brewing in Marion and we knew we'd be stuck inside if we stayed the whole weekend. When we left Marion the temperature was 93 with the humidity at around 100%. Forty miles and three thousand feet of elevation later it was a WONDERFUL 78 degrees with humidity around 70% when we pulled up to our house...ahhh HEAVEN ON EARTH! I actually carved a sign years ago making it official....it's what we call our home.
I suppose having lived here for twenty years with no air conditioning has really affected my tolerance of it. Most people up here don't even have a window unit a/c. in their homes. Cars yes but not in their houses. Tourist places and stores do have it but most homeowners don't choose to have it. We usually have about ten or fifteen days per summer when the wind isn't blowing and the heat/humidity gets up into the high eighties, low nineties that we talk about going to Lowes and buying a little a/c unit to put in one room but, we never seem to get around to it. Once the sun goes down behind the mountain it cools off quite nicely. Actually, at seven o'clock this morning it was 59 degrees...pretty cool. Sure makes power bills smaller than our off the mountain brethren. Of course, I won't go into the winters here...Good Lord the winters are long, snowy and colder than a bankers heart. I guess I shouldn't bitch too much about the heat.
We spent Sunday being lazy. I decide to start picking the guitar a bit more than I have in a while. I need the practice. I played a few tunes at a party at the campground where we have our RV parked on Lake James and all of the sudden, I've been asked to start playing weekends at the clubhouse! Trust me...my massive ego enjoys being asked to do so but the musical semi-perfectionist in me has me panicking! Good grief I'm rusty. I haven't played much in a while because I HATE playing solo and I don't know many musicians that I can tolerate being around anymore. Seems to be that most of the good ones are drunks, drug users or just plain crazy. Don't get me wrong...I used to be all of the above but...I finally grew up. Granted, it took forty five years and Michelle to settle me down but I did finally mature a bit. I still drink a little and, if I'm in the mood, I might even take a toke off a joint but I absolutely can't stand drunks or crazy people. Liquor and drugs get blamed for a lot of stuff they never caused...some folks are just nutcases waiting for an excuse to show their asses! I hope I can find some folks to pick with who aren't too crazy.
Off the topic...
Can you believe the idiots who are claiming that Israel is using too much force in their retaliation against Lebanon? I don't get it. No fight was ever won by counter punching with equal force. Without an overwhelming counter attack, every war ever fought would still be raging. Wars ALWAYS end because someone got their ass whipped. PERIOD.
Well, gotta go do dinner, call my Mom and Dad and spend some time with my precious little woman.

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